Instilling good morals to children

 

 An incident in the morning made my heart worry where we are really heading to. By this I mean morally since it seems everyone is free to do whatever he or she wishes and has no one to fear or shy from. This is cutting across all ages not choosing any gender or even class. The mostly affected though to be the lower class living in the semi urban and rural areas across the country. We were boarding a matatu when this man of early 30s carrying a young boy of about 8yrs entered the vehicle. Shortly a far we heard a woman shouting and hauling insult to the man who we came to realize later was the husband. They seemed to be in a nasty mood but what really bothered me was the atrocity they had hauling insults to each other in front of us and their young son. The young boy was from hospital and had his lower lip bandaged which obviously must have been from their presumed numerous fights in their home. The worst thing a couple can do is to quarrel in front of their children despite the cause of their argument. Parents should be mature enough to keep it cool under any circumstances never to fight or return any abusive words in their children’s presence. After a few years the young boy will be a father and a husband and a psychology states young minds tends to get what they see and experience more than what they are being told. mostly we tend to wonder why our children grow up to being far from what we taught them and we become frustrated blaming them not looking deep into our life’s which in fact is the real reason for that cause. When parents have a quarrel, which is normal in a marriage, the big question is not why they have it but how they handle it even more in their children’s company. They marriage problems we have today are as a result of what we saw our parents do and since we trust them we tend to assume they are correct. They will also treat and want to behave as they have experienced in their growth. They duo continued with their quarrels even after boarding the car and had no respect for the people in the matatu. It had to take serious intervention of the driver and the passengers to calm them down after sensing danger in what would traverse to a war. We could feel the emotions in them and smelled a fight would erupt soon. The wife was ready and steady to combat any attack from his man as it appeared he was used to the fights. This is a challenge to everyone, respect everyone’s space. Parents are warned, children learn more from what they see and experience rather than what you just tell them. The understanding of what they go through is usually kept in mind more than what you keep on telling them yet you do not practice. According to a counselor Elizabeth he advises parents on being a role model. She states ”Young kids are like sponges, they notice everything. As parents we are our children’s first role model. Pay attention to what you say or do around them and think about what kind of example you are making. Want to teach kids about charity? Get involved and take your kids with you to a soup kitchen or homeless shelter and help serve up meals. Explain to them why you do acts of charity so they understand why they should. Teach kids about chores by setting a schedule and having them help you out. Don’t tell your child to do something, but ask for their help. The earlier they learn to help you, the longer they will be willing to. Want your kids to listen to you? Show them you can listen to them. If you want your son or daughter to learn to share, set a good example and share your things with2 Give up your vices. Gambling, alcohol and drugs can jeopardize your child’s financial security. Smoking, for example, almost always introduces health hazards to your child’s environment. Second-hand smoke has been linked to several respiratory ailments in children. It could also contribute to the early death of a parent. Alcohol and drugs might also introduce health hazards or violence to your child’s environment. Helping them feel safe: Respect their privacy as you would want them to respect yours; for example, if you teach your child that your room is out of boundaries to them, respect the same with their room. Allow them to feel that once they enter their room they can know that no one will look through their drawers, or read their diary. Let your child live his/her life and let them make their own choices in life. Instill in them, a sense of belonging by displaying individual and family portraits on the walls of the house. Don’t argue with your spouse in front of the children. If they are sleeping, argue quietly. Children may feel insecure and fearful when they hear parents bickering. In addition, children will learn to argue with each other the same way they hear their parents argue with each other. Show them that when people disagree, they can discuss their differences peacefully”. Train your child in the correct way and He shall not depart from it even when He grows up.

DIVORCE TO MY FRIEND MR ALCOHOL

Am so much worried of how mean you are that I can’t find the guts to start by greeting you. Anyway I know you are never good and that I expect. Or is there because am yet to find it. For the last 10 years I have been faithful to you but what do you pay me with? Ooh is it the debts I have or the enemies you have awarded me not forgetting the unending scars from the injuries I acquire after every encounter with you. I am very devoted to you every time. I give my time and resources just to be with you, a few minutes after you take control of the whole body yet only the mouth was responsible. Why are you so selfish? Mostly I go with my friends to your office we are very joyful and after consuming your friend a delicious plate of meat, we welcome you to our table. You are very friendly but conniving. At first you are very sweet and enjoyable. We chart a lot and are very lively mostly if we are watching a game of football. We enjoy a lot and as we take you the more you become interesting and we ask for more and more. You have no respect for time or money cursed is you. I wake up every day at 5 in the morning to prepare and report to work by seven. I have to trek for more than 30 minutes to my work place. I spend the whole day carrying stones in the construction site not mentioning the insults hauled at me every minute by my manager who gives me no time even to breath. Not mentioning the injuries stones inflict on me as I carry them daily. By the end of the day after all my expenses I go home with only 150. On Sunday, I have about 900 but to you that a lot of money for one day. Combining with what my friends have, we get enough for the day. Am not the best paid so I cannot take the best quality you have. This means I am the target for those culprits who make you illegally just to enrich themselves from you. It just takes a few minutes to realize I have nothing left in my pocket and the best you can do to console me is taking you on a loan which of course I will pay dearly. What do you have since every time I taste you I cannot control myself and I keep on wanting every bit of you. Most of the time I don’t know how I arrive home but I wake up only to find myself with injuries, hangovers and head aching. God what did I do as my mind is bland and my memory gone. This didn’t end well of course. So I get my phone to call my friends and inquire what really went down. To my surprise my phone is gone all thanks to you my friend. The only things I hear are stories of how we fought even some times with my friends. It’s a Monday morning and I don’t feel like reporting to work but remembering I need to pay the debts you wholeheartedly presented me I have to report. What wrong did I ever do to you? Have I disobeyed you in any way. Why do you treat me in such away? For sure “Asante ya punda ni mateke”. That’s all you give to me all the time I befriend you. You are so unfaithful. I heard what you did to my friends all over Kenya mostly in Embu killing over 100 fellow through you relative ‘Country Man’. Those who are survived cannot recognize day and night you blinded them all mercilessly. Please have the gut and lets us part ways peacefully please.

kiambu bursary bill

THE kiambu assembly set to approve a proposed county bursary bill. The bill seeks to help the poor, physically and mentally disabled in the county. The bill may become a model law as it has an amount totaling to eighty five per cent of the monies set aside for disbursement under the Act which shall be allocated equally to all the 60 Wards in the county. Speaking yesterday outside the county assembly in Kiambu education committee chairman in the assembly Joel waicere ward rep Kalimoni ward said that the proposal bill drafted by the county government through the committee on education was a different fund from the constituency development fund bursary as it has its own committee and will seek to eliminate the irregularities that are seen in the CDF bursary which is solely run by the Mp’s. “This is a good bill which has undergone scrutiny by the assembly committee on education and it has gone its second reading in the floor of the house without a hitch and it is not like the CDF bursary as we it seeks to form a committee in every ward which will scrutinize and vet eligible applicants,“ said Waicere. The county representatives all have to wait for the bill to be assented since it will empower those without resources but have the urge to study. Education in the county has been on the drop and it will raise the standard of education eradicating illiteracy one of the main goals of their vision. The county has about 1,135 Primary schools and 373 Secondary schools with a 291,765 enrolment in Primary schools and Teacher to Pupil Ratio of 1: 43 in Public Schools. Secondary has an enrolment of 73,831 students and a Teacher to Pupil Ratio of 1:20 in Public Schools. There are more than 15 Tertiary institutions all over the county including the famous Kiambu institute of Science and Technology KIST located near Kiambu town Adult Literacy Classes has an enrolment of over 9,337 people yearly.

INSECURITY

12/05/2014 Insecurity By Felix Gichane Insecurity has been a major concern for Kiambu residents for a long period in the recent times. This comes after a man was found dead under a tree near Kimbo town on Saturday morning. The gentleman who was in his mid 30s could not be identified at the moment and the cause of his death remains a mystery. However it is suspected that the man may have been killed elsewhere and his body deposited there at night. According to Mary Wangui who sells groceries at the area, they found the man lying there in the cold and after checking they found he was breathless. “I have never experienced this for the past 30 years I have stayed in this area and government should be vigilant about this”, added Wangui. They decided to inform the local administration after the people from the area failed to identify the corpse. The guy did not have an injury or any scar suggesting he had internal complications which were not identified at the moment. Ruiru sub-county took the body to city mortuary for postmortem and urged the public who may have lost a friend or relative to visit their office for confirmation. Addressing the media earlier Ruiru OCPD Isaac Thuranira assured the residents to remain calm and they were in pursuit with the culprit to make sure they are apprehended. “We are not going to sleep until those criminals are brought to book” He was speaking after two men were brutally murdered and another gravely injured by armed thugs at a residential home within Juja farm of Kiambu County. The attackers jumped the storey perimeter wall accessing the area killing the two instantly. The motive behind the attack has not yet been identified since they did not steal anything from the farm and only seemed their mission was to kill Eliud Kabiru who was the farm’s assistant manager and Stanley Kihara who was a contractor. Juja MP, Francis Waititu called for the reassignment of police officers from the area stating they had shown great laxity since they have been unable to curb the soaring crime rate in the region. The injured John Ndegwa was rushed to Thika Level 5 Hospital and is recuperating well according to his doctors. The government has employed all efforts to bring the rate of crime and insecurity down and the residents have an immense part to assist in bringing that dream to a reality

CREATING A SELLING CULTURE

This is a report that shocked me.
“A recent survey done by Nielsen Kenya has findings that Kenyans could well be sitting on billions of unused inventory that they could easily turn to cash. Nielsen reports that some Kshs 158 billion worth of unused goods in a survey carried out across the country in 2014.
Nairobi, the capital naturally leads with some unused goods worth 69 billion Kenya shillings followed by Eastern with 26 billion and Central with 22 billion. The value of the unused art collections per capita (per person) is the highest at Kshs. 144,073 followed by furniture at Ksh. 27,765 and Computers/Laptops Ksh. 25,057.
This is easily about 5% of Kenya’s GDP we are sitting on should people choose to sell it.
Priscilla Muhiu, Head of Marketing OLX in Kenya, says that when people have a financial need, they would rather ask for a loan from a friend or even a bank. Selling the items they don’t need or don’t use anymore is not top of mind. People need to realize that the items the keep in their homes could be valuable as a source of cash.
Liquidating these personal long-term assets (converting them into cash) could improve their purchasing power while also optimizing these items ‘value before they are fully depreciated or disposed as waste.
“If one was to sell every unused good in a full house, they could make enough money to meet their financial needs. In fact, you might even have money to start a business or explore other economic ventures,” she says. “.
The AC Nielsen research shows that if we had a good turn-over of a fraction of the used items that people are keeping in their homes, 4 things will happen;
1) More money will flow back into our economy, spurring demand for goods and services
2) People who are selling will be able to lower their cost of living by being able to offset the cost of upgrading into a new item with the revenue they will earn by selling the older item
3)Overall,  other people looking for acquiring goods at lower price points, for example a student who has just gotten her/his first job will be able to  afford high quality  items at lower prices if they buy them used .
4) Where people don’t have to borrow money at a high-interest, they will make their lives even cheaper”.
40% of the 855 respondents surveyed did not sell because they didn’t think they had anything to sell. Considering that furniture, clothing and books lead the unsold inventory, we have quite a huge potential of making money out of things we perceive useless while at the same time would prove to be useful to others.”
Ever wondered how many times you trekked because you had no fare or slept hungry with nothing in your pocket? Then look at that thing lying in your room and you do not use it and blame yourself.
We the recent adverts all over the media mostly by olx, we have no excuse. In earlier days we thought what we had was useless and could not help anyone but for sure we know that is not true for know and you can sell that appliance no matter how small it is and get some cash back.
By selling what we have we create room in our houses.Image
We also have a chance to sell something smaller and get a bigger according to our desires.
When quality is concerned you can sell what you have and due to our great diversions in classes someone may appreciate what may be low class to you.
You can sell what you have and get what you require.
Kudos to OLX and other companies that have brought this great platform that is easier and more secure to everyone. So Kenyans lets rise to the challenge and utilize this free opportunity to make our lives better and grow our economy.

KEEP SMILING

A smile they say chases an approaching enemy and that’s enough reason to smile. A smiling face is very attractive and welcoming.  Its much easier to smile than to frown hence, as they say, the next time you’re feeling down or out of sorts, try a smile. If you can’t find a reason to smile, pop in a funny DVD, read the Sunday comics or call a friend, then you may be able to even read the word smile and feel better. According to research published in Psychological Science, simply reading certain words may also have the same effect. Just like seeing someone else smile makes you smile, reading emotion verbs (like smile, grin, frown, etc.) can also activate specific facial muscles. According to psychologists these are the advantages of smiling -; Smiling makes you more attractive. Ever wonder why are we always asked to smile in photos? It is because people usually look their best and happiest when smiling. According to the American Academy of Cosmetic Dentistry, 96% of American adults believe an attractive smile makes a person more appealing to members of the opposite sex. So the next time you are about to ask someone on a date, smile. It’ll make them feel happier, and you’ll already be more attractive in his or her eyes! Smiling can help you de-stress. The next time you’re stressed about work or realize that your hair feel a little snug, don’t freak out. Take a few deep breaths and smile! Smiling may help to reduce symptoms associated with anxiety. When that smile signals to your brain that you’re feeling happy (even though you’re not really feeling happy…yet), your body will usually slow its breathing and heart rate. Reducing stress is so important for health, too, as it can lower blood pressure, improve digestion and regulate blood sugar. Note that this works during workouts, too! If you’re having a hard time getting through that last rep or getting those final 5 minutes in on the treadmill, smiling can do wonders! Smiling can help you land a job. If you’re about to go on a job interview, you may think that your appearance is just about wearing nice clothes. Wrong! You can’t just wear that suit; you have to wear it with a smile. In a study published in the December 2009 issue of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, people looked at full-body photographs of 123 people they had never met. The people in the photos had one of two expressions: neutral (think your passport photo) or a smile. And guess what? When observers saw the photos of smiling people, they were more likely to think that the person in the photo was likeable, confident, conscientious and stable. Sound like traits most companies want in an employee, right? So the next time you’re dressing to impress, make sure to take that beautiful, natural smile with you! Smiling can lead to laughter. Have you ever laughed without smiling? It’s pretty impossible to do. And it’s funny how a smile here and a smile there with friends can turn into a whole fit of hysterical laughter. Numerous studies have been done on the health benefits of laughing, including how it acts like a mini workout that burns calories and works the abs. Laughter also helps blood flow, lowers blood sugar levels, reduces stress and improves sleep. It may also raise the level of infection-fighting antibodies in the body, which helps boost your immune system. So the moral of this story is smile—and laugh—often! Smiling is a great way to make yourself stand out while helping your body to function better. Smile to improve your health, your stress level, and your attractiveness. Smiling is just one fun way to live longer read about the others and try as many as you can. Smiling Makes Us Attractive We are drawn to people who smile. There is an attraction factor. We want to know a smiling person and figure out what is so good. Frowns, scowls and grimaces all push people away — but a smile draws them in (avoid these smile aging habits to keep your smile looking great). Smiling Changes Our Mood Next time you are feeling down, try putting on a smile. There’s a good chance you mood will change for the better. Smiling can trick the body into helping you change your mood. Smiling Is Contagious When someone is smiling they lighten up the room, change the moods of others, and make things happier. A smiling person brings happiness with them. Smile lots and you will draw people to you. Smiling Boosts Your Immune System Smiling helps the immune system to work better. When you smile, immune function improves possibly because you are more relaxed. Prevent the flu and colds by smiling. Smiling Lowers Your Blood Pressure When you smile, there is a measurable reduction in your blood pressure. Give it a try if you have a blood pressure monitor at home. Sit for a few minutes, take a reading. Then smile for a minute and take another reading while still smiling. Do you notice a difference? Smiling Releases Endorphins, Natural Pain Killers and Serotonin Studies have shown that smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers, and serotonin. Together these three make us feel good. Smiling is a natural drug. Smiling Lifts the Face and Makes You Look Younger The muscles we use to smile lift the face, making a person appear younger. Don’t go for a face lift, just try smiling your way through the day — you’ll look younger and feel better. Smiling Makes You Seem Successful Smiling people appear more confident, are more likely to be promoted, and more likely to be approached. Put on a smile at meetings and appointments and people will react to you differently. Smiling Helps You Stay Positive Try this test: Smile. Now try to think of something negative without losing the smile. It’s hard. When we smile our body is sending the rest of us a message that “Life is Good!” Stay away from depression, stress and worry by smiling. You have nothing to lose by smiling, just take the step and keep a welcoming face. Just smile all the way through your troubles to your success.

Have a smiling week.

FGM IS NATIONAL CRIME

I echo the leader of majority in the parliament Hon. Aden Duale that Female Genital Mutilation [F.G.M] is a national menace just as other calamity including HIV/AIDS and insecurity.
He added that those encouraging FGM are as bad as poachers and most of all Alshabaabs.
This comes barely a week after the Masai’s women from Narok County ganged up in one voice in an effort to legalize it as a passage of rite in their community.
Worst of all those in the fore front were the same women who underwent the same horrifying experience but are so heartless to let their own children go through the same cruelty.
As the most Masai’s would say, circumcision is a way to ensure marriage because Masai men reject women who are uncut not knowing circumcision can spread HIV/AIDS among other diseases
“Cutting girls is something our people have done for hundreds of years,” Nashiru, the senior FGM ‘surgeon’ in the Masai community of Ol Donyo Nyokie who believes in the virtues of FGM. “No one can convince us that it is wrong.”
The women believe that an uncut woman has sexual feelings for every man she comes across, and is likely to stray from her marriage. In fact, they see FGM as a tool to curb the spread of HIV/AIDS in their community.
“When you cut a girl, you know she will remain pure until she gets married, and that after marriage, she will be faithful,” Nashiru explained. “But when you leave a girl uncut, she sleeps with any man and brings the disease into the community.”
Many deaths have been reported during the process but still they would no’t soften their heart.
Worst of all when the oldest girl comes of age, her parents might have all her younger sisters cut to save the cost of having several ceremonies not even considering their age.
Pateli, an ardent anti-FGM campaigner, painfully narrated how she was forced to circumcise her own daughter when the community threatened to ostracize her and her family. “I had hardened, but my girl was under so much pressure from her peers and elderly women that she eventually begged me to take her for the procedure,” Pateli recounted.
The young men in the community, known as ‘Moran’, or warriors, strongly believe that FGM is a useful practice that keeps women chaste. “I am married to a woman who is cut, and will be cutting my daughter when the time comes,” Kapande ole Saitoti, an Ol Donyo Nyokie Moran once said. “You cannot claim to be a Masai man or woman if you are not circumcised.”
In fact, the girls in the community reported that men were the biggest hindrance to the fight against FGM, because they continued to reject women who were uncut.
Myths explains the origin of female circumcision in the story of Naipei, a young girl who had intercourse with the enemy of her family, and whose punishment came in the form of circumcision, a decision her family took to prevent her from feeling the urges that had led her to commit the crime.
Since that day, in a bid to protect their honor and the honor of the Masai society, all Masai girls who reach adolescence have been circumcised. The aim of FGM is therefore to limit the sexual desire and promiscuity of girls.
The ceremony of FGM marks the coming of age of a girl; she sheds the last vestiges of childhood and joins the league of womankind. It is traditionally performed between the ages of 12 and 14 and is part of the traditional rites of passage for girls, in order for them to be considered adults in their community. A 2005 survey of the Masai community in Ol Donyo Nyokie (population: 665), found that 100 percent of girls above the age of 15 had undergone FGM.
Following the ceremony there is a period of seclusion, during which girls are educated about their rights and duties as women – they learn how to prepare food, take care of a home and children, and how to look after their future husbands. Once this period is over, a girl is considered an honorable woman and is free to marry even most being under 18years of age.
The importance of this practice among the Masai is considerable. FGM is perceived as bringing honor to a girl and to her family; by making her eligible for marriage it raises the status of her family in the eyes of society. The Maasai have held to the custom in the face of widespread criticism by Kenyan society and the international community and despite criminalization of the practice by the Kenyan government in 2002.
The vast majority, 85%, of genital mutilations performed in Africa consist of clitoridectomy
Many educated Masai men and women still favor the practice of FGM, not because they are uninformed about the risks involved, but for fear of the social repercussions, should they reject the custom. An uncircumcised woman remains a girl in the eyes of the community, however much education she may have, or whatever status she may attain in the outside world. For a woman who refuses to be circumcised, the risk of isolation is great, the chances of finding a Masai spouse are reduced to almost nil, and her status in society will always be that of a child.
The FGM ceremony takes place once a year and brings together all girls who come of age during that year. It is a large community event, marked by joyful revelry and feasting. A traditional circumciser, usually an elderly woman with great experience, performs the actual procedure. All the girls are circumcised on the same day and, until recent times, with the same instrument, usually a sharp knife known as an “ormurunya”. A paste made from cow dung and milk fat is applied to stop bleeding. The end of the period of seclusion is also marked by celebrations officially welcoming the girls into womanhood.
The Masai practice type-1 FGM, also known as a clitoridectomy, which involves the removal of the clitoral hood and all or part of the clitoris. Physical effects of the clitoridectomy include:

reduced sexual desire
– bleeding, often severe enough to cause death
– infection, particularly due to poor sanitary conditions
– risk of HIV transmission due to sharing of knives
– complications during childbirth, often leading to stillbirths
Despite their firm hold on their culture, certain aspects of FGM have begun to change. In the era of HIV/AIDS, the Masai are aware of the risks involved in using the same knife for several procedures and, more often than not, today each individual is circumcised using a different blade. Studies by the non-governmental organization, Maendeleo Ya Wanawake (MYWO), show that only 14 percent of circumcisers still use the same knife for several girls.
This change may be slight, but observers and campaigners consider that it nevertheless displays openness among the Maasai to the idea that aspects of their traditional culture can be altered for the better.

One of the main approaches used by agencies trying to address the widespread practice of FGM is the introduction of alternative rites that are still acceptable and relevant to communities and allow girls to have a coming of age ceremony, but exclude cutting of the girl’s genitalia. MYWO and the Programme for Appropriate Technology in Health spearheaded a series of alternative rites ceremonies across Kenya in 1996, and have continued to hold them annually since. In these alternative ceremonies, girls are still educated about their role as women in society, but receive more relevant instruction, such as lessons about reproductive health and the importance of formal education.
FGM is illegal in Kenya, but the law is rarely applied against practitioners or parents who make their children undergo it. The Masai are a close-knit community who live largely by their own rules, and have resisted modernization. It is this adherence to their own traditions that makes the eradication of FGM among the Masai such an uphill task for those seeking to end the practice.Image
The Anti- FGM campaign Chairlady Linah Jebii Kilimo have urged the women in the region to look for other ways and the government is more keen now and those sill practicing the vice will be treated as offenders.
Its high time that the government takes it role in curbing this menace and come up with proper measures to ensure that Masai girls are well protected and prevent all the injustices and complications that arise from the cut some which are life time and spoils the girls entire life.
When all is said and done, FGM will still remain illegal in Kenya and it’s a shame seeing Masai women joining and conducting demonstrations challenging the government to legalize such a heartbreaking life issue.
It has been noted with great concern that men from Tanzania are taking advantage of the issue and are marrying the circumcised girls from Kenya hence encouraging FGM.
The parents are the only one left smiling after the great bride price that they get from those seeking their daughters hand in marriage.

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